The Wisdom of "Mick The Quick"

"Ain't no sense worrying: If you have no control over something, ain't no sense worrying about it -you have no control over it anyway. If you do have control, why worry? So either way, there ain't no sense worrying."
-Mickey Rivers

"You can't improve what's bad, you can

only build up what's good."
-Mickey Rivers

"Pitching is 80% of the game and the other half is hitting and fielding"
-Mickey Rivers

"We'll do all right if we can capitalize on our mistakes."
-Mickey Rivers

"My goals are to hit .300, score 100 runs, and stay injury-prone."
-Mickey Rivers

"I might have to commute.  You know, left field, DH, wherever."
-Mickey Rivers

"I was eating too well and getting too much rest.  I take my old lady dancing every night now.  Doin' the bump keeps your legs in shape."
-Mickey Rivers' response to a 1975 interview question of why he started playing better

"I'm going to double my limit."
-Mickey Rivers' response to a 1975 interview question asking him how many bases he was going to steal that season.

"Me and George and Billy are two of a kind."
-Mickey Rivers, on his relationship with George Steinbrenner and Billy Martin

"That felt good.  I hadn't hit off a lefty in two months."
 -Mickey Rivers' post game comment after hitting a double off of Boston Red Sox right handed pitcher Bob Stanley.

"No wonder you're all mixed up.  You got a white man's first name, a Spanish man's second name and a black man's third name."
-Mickey made this comment to Reginald (Reggie) Martinez Jackson in July of 1977

"Out of what, a thousand?"
Mickey Rivers, responding to teammate Reggie Jackson's claim he had an IQ of 160

"You'd better stop readin' and writin' and start hittin' !"
-Mickey Rivers' quip back at Reggie Jackson when Jackson told Rivers, in front of reporters, that he should learn how to read and write.

"What was the name of that dog on 'Rin Tin Tin?"
-Mickey Rivers

"I felt alone out there, like I was on a desert island.  I felt like Gilligan."
-Mickey Rivers' response to playing left field for the first time

"He was lost out there.  He was the Lost Mohegan."
-Mickey Rivers on a teammate who just played his first game

"The wind was blowin' about 100 degrees."          
-Mickey Rivers' response to the wind

in the outfield at Chicago's Comiskey Park

"The first thing you do when you get out to center field is put up your finger and check

the wind-chill factor."
-Mickey Rivers

"I didn't want the wind to hit me, so I tried

to outrun the wind."
-Mickey Rivers

"I was brought up in Florida, so there isn't much difference between playing there and playing here.  The climax are about the same."
-Mickey Rivers on playing in Texas

"He's so ugly. When you walked by him, your pants wrinkle. He made fly balls curve foul."
-Mickey Rivers on  former Major Leaguer Danny Napoleon's looks

"He is so ugly he should have to wear an oxygen mask."
-Mickey Rivers on teammate Cliff Johnson's looks

"These guys are so old they're eligible for meals on wheels."
 -Mickey Rivers commenting on the age of Texas Rangers teammates Bill Stein and Larry Bittner

"I like playing on this team. We actually been doin' real good. Got a different mix here. Most important thing is you gotta keep pickin' up in paces. That's why we're playing contentious play. We got top names, guys can still hit in the majors, guys been out of the game hittin' the ball, shockin' it. Don't have no old, old guys. Not sayin' they don't get a good job done. Fact is, they've been vice versa. So that's incentive right there. It's been a plus."
-Mickey Rivers commenting on his teammates in the SPBL in 1989

"It was so cold today that I saw a dog chasing a cat, and the dog was walking."
-Mickey Rivers